Being diagnosed with a mental disorder was definitely a very eye-opening experience for me (Let’s not mention emotionally). Getting to know exactly what I am dealing with. Finding ways to free my mind or be able to find ways to manage these disorders successfully, gave me the drive to set off on this journey to reach my mental cloud 9.
I never imagined in a million years, what I would uncover about myself as I embarked on this ship that drifts into the depths of my mind. I was truly on a mental pirate treasure hunt. Seeking out hidden jewels, unlocking doors with endless possibilities, and finding treasures in darkness.
One part of this journey that I was not anticipating much was the moments that I would need to spend alone. Time to truly get to know me. Rediscovering me all over again.
Like any other pirate hunt, there would be obstacles that would come about as I sailed closer to my treasure. Some obstacles are harder than others. But if you get to where X marks the spot, then it’s all worth it.
Having to confront all kinds of ugly monsters that came up out of the ocean that I created in my mind. A seemingly endless wave of thoughts and emotions, that pulled up on the shore and retreated as quickly as they came. The wish-washy thinking overflowed my mental state.
On my way to my destination, I’ve come across those moments when I veer off course and begin to lose my way. I get sucked into the whirlpool of my negative thoughts, my insecurities, my self-doubt, all circling me trying to pull me down to the depths of the abyss.
It’s at these times, my fight or flight response kicks in, and until now, it has always been my fight reaction that has thus gotten me this far in my travels. I always find a way to get back on course and continue to seek the treasure I know is hidden deep within me.
I continue to fight against obstacles every day, guiding myself with this map I call life, to find the place where X marks the spot. Knowing that like any other treasure hunt, with time and patience, the treasure that I uncover will shine bright to those around me who are seeking to find the same.
In the moments when I have a breakthrough and see change where once there seemed to be no hope, I realize I uncover a new treasure. A treasure that isn’t meant for me to take and keep for myself.
But a treasure that is to be shared with others. A treasure that will shine bright enough to lead the way for others who are lost on that same journey as you.
That is ultimately our purpose. To find our treasure and share it with the world. So we may shine the way and help others uncover their hidden treasures also.