MentalCloud9
April 7, 2021
Stripped Away
Life is so full of surprises. It’s like the saying from Forrest Gump goes, “Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what your gonna get.” Never has this saying rang true to me more than now. The last 2 years have been a whirlwind of self-discovery moments, emotional chaos, and heartbreak and …
Because I wasn’t good enough…for me!
I had always been good enough. With BPD, without BPD, I had always been good enough. I had been too blind to see it. One day something happened. God took the blinders off, and I realized that I had always been good enough…just not good enough for me. I had been holding myself to impossible …
Raw and exposed (BPD)
Force field It makes me feel angry whenever these thoughts pop up in my mind. I think about all the unnecessary abuse and hurt that I put myself through for others. How vulnerable I became in hopes of happily ever after. Only to find myself making the same bad choices over and over again. How …
Instant gratification generation
The world around us moves forward in leaps and bounds. We see technology developing quicker than we can keep up with. Days go by like a swift wind passing through. Long gone are the days of taking time to slow down and truly enjoy the good things. Living this way has affected people physically and, …
The Perception Prison
A way of regarding, understanding, or interpreting something; a mental impression Perception No middle ground Perception is everything. Every trauma burns an imprint that in some way changes the way you perceive yourself and the world around you. So what impressions morphed your perceptions? For many of us living with BPD, the effects of our …
BPD-Borderline Personality Disorder or Bringing People Down?
Self-evaluation Having BPD or borderline personality disorder can be tricky. The rawness of your emotions coupled with overthinking, impulsivity, and anger make for a cocktail of disaster at times. It causes you to feel like a nuisance to those closest to you. I lived this way for years. I allowed my disorder to define me. …
Continue reading “BPD-Borderline Personality Disorder or Bringing People Down?”
The uneasiness of finding peace
I had always imagined finding my peace in some majestic, glorious moment that would cause an overnight life-altering experience. Unfortunately, that is not how it played out. It was going to take more than the wave of a magic wand to begin to make the necessary changes to find my ultimate peace…my mental cloud 9. …
Taking your mind back
Something had to change For many years, I felt like I’d been walking around living life through the eyes of others. I noticed that I rarely enjoyed life the way I wanted to. I had many joys and reasons to celebrate. But for some reason, I felt that I still had not been able to …
It’s All In The Fall
Broken We have all felt this way at one point or another. You set specific goals that you know will enhance your life and mental health. You make a clear plan. You get pumped and feel ready to take on the world. Then a situation will come along and pull you ten steps backward. You …
From figment to physical
The cold sweats, the rapid trembling, the racing heartbeat, the tightening in the chest. These are all symptoms I know too well. At times it felt as though I was having a heart attack. The physical symptoms are produced by what began as a figment in my mind. Whether real or perceived, it is very …
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